Found this monstrosity in my room tonight and quickly ejected it. How fucked am I lads? Reckon it has a mate or is it too early for them to have mates? (That’s an A4 envelope for scale)

14 comments

1. Is it real lol

2. I heard in a documentary they only wander about in the open when they’re trying to find a mate, so I think you’ll be grand.

   But you might suddenly notice a lot of flies about your house in the coming days.

3. Nuke it from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.

4. We are so fucked. What the fuck is this????

5. Let it bite you and see if you become Spider-Man/Woman

6. Lying in bed right now shaking

7. only solution

   

8. Your brother made friends? I’m jealous.

9. Why do people adopt the “burn it to the ground” type rhetoric when they see a big spider, its such a weird echo chamber meme mindset. This is free pest control, the most annoying thing about cohabiting with a spider is it shitting all down the wall/skirting board but they do more good than they do bad.

10. WHAT THE HELL IS EVEN THAT

11. Doubt it. The males wander when they’re looking for a mate, and when they find one, they usually don’t survive too long because the female eats him. The very fact that he’s alive in the first place is more than likely proof that you won’t be having spider babies in the house anytime soon.

12. Probably ate the mates – watch your back.

13. We have those giant teganaria’s in Wicklow too, they’re a bit aggressive and will give you a dose of venom if you taunt it. The bite isn’t dangerous but itches like hell.

14. Wolf spider. You ever seen the movie arachnophobia?