Long time democrat, only recently began experimenting with weather control. Looking for next step advice.

35 comments

1. You gotta scale it. Look on Temu for a jar big enough to fit the earth. Should be $3.99 with free shipping.

2. I’m really sick and tired of this misinformation. We’re not “controlling the weather” as only White Jesus can do that. What we do is sneak into red areas, have a couple gay orgies/abortion parties, and then let White Jesus’s wrath handle the rest. Easy as pie.

3. Bigger jar.

4. Commie leftist invents tornado grenade to destroy free speech and suck patriots guns into the sky

   -elon

5. you’re going to need a big lair, some henchmen, and a satellite dish – the bigger the better.

6. 

7. If you provide some (((tribe credentials))) I can get you on the Space Laser roster.

8. Unleash that fury upon our enemies obviously.

9. You need a staff, or at least a wand.

10. Could use a bay leaf or two

11. You need to be wearing a tin foil hat when you use that machine.

12. Convert to Judaism and they will let you use the laser.

13. Witchcraft!!!

14. Hurricane season better end soon, I’m waiting to start the annual war on Christmas.  

15. It really only works in red states, you may have to move

16. Once you’ve mastered the Mason jar you can probably start moving into a 5gal bucket. It will take a lot more energy so you’ll need more adrenochrome and aborted fetuses to run it. Not a lot more but a few x more. It’ll take a few tries before you probably get okay. Just make sure your electric car is charged up to help run it at the bucket stage. After that you can move to a 55 drum. This is probably the harder stage because it is a lot taller than wide.

17. More windmills.

18. You have to be a double warlock.

    1 Be born a warlock
    2 Go to school and get a sex change
    3 Go back to school and be changed back

    We just can’t have everyone running
    around changing the weather

19. Don’t forget the bay leaf.

20. The memes write themselves with this one. Perfect timing!

21. You joke, but tomorrow, MTG will have this photo on X as proof of her accusations & some of the simpletons will completely believe it.

22. If you have any Jewish friends, ask them if you can barrow their space laser.

23. Did you get the space laser app on iStore?

24. You need a bigger jar first

25. You release it in Florida like Marge said. That jar works like a pokeball.

26. I saw a post in a sub, it asked “Why haven’t republicans learned weather control?”

    I would prefer to ask “Why hasn’t orange orc figured it out?”

27. Depends on how much chili you can eat.

28. I hear your Cranberry Raisin Typhoon won blue ribbon at County Fair. Congrats!

29. that’s the wrong jar rookie!

30. You’re on the right track. Just scale that up.

31. open the cap and throw the water into the air, it will grow and become a full sized tornado, i did one yesterday down in florida – worked really well.

32. Open it and release it in a red zone? Then apply to the Biden Admin apparently?

33. You misunderstand, it’s not *all* democrats that harness the ability to control “acts of god”.

    

    Zeus is a democrat.

34. Explain to me like I’m 5 why you aren’t sending more rain to my fire ravaged red state in the summer.

35. Ask the Rothchilds if you can borrow their space laser. That way, only you can cause forest fires.