UUnited Kingdom

Heed This Warning

  • October 16, 2024



Grabbed these along with some lunch from Aldi on the way to work this morning. I know it says on the back excessive consumption may produce laxative effects…

If like me you read that and think “fuck it, I’ve got an iron stomach” or as Withnail says “Balls! I’ll swallow it and run a mile” do not make the same mistake I did at lunchtime and eat the whole pack.

Waves of absolutely spectacular flatulence every so often punctuated with high pressure jets liquid shit. Fairly sure I’ve got some Imodium at home which might get me through the stand up gig I’m meant to be going to tonight. We’ve all seen the funny reviews of what happens when you overindulge in this sugar free stuff but seriously, it’s all true and rather unpleasant.

by Alone-Shame-8890

48 comments

  2. Yes I’ve made this mistake before. The Sherbert Lemons got me..

    It’s not just sugar free, by the time it’s done with you, you’ll also be completely free of sugar, or indeed anything else you happened to have in your digestive system.

  3. Dried Apricots have that affect on me, I love them, but I eat a handful and a few hours later the gurgling starts!

  4. I wonder where the line between ‘just enough’ and ‘excessive’ falls. The whole bag is only 3 servings. They should market these things as a laxative given how often these stories come out!

  5. Similar explosive experience with sugar free lollipops, spent a meeting slowy blowing up like augustus gloop before exiting to the car park like a unknotted balloon. I didnt need to use my legs to get to the car….

  6. Any sweetener with ‘-ol’ as a suffix, STEER CLEAR.

    Sorbitol, Maltitol, Xylitol… why they don’t use sucralose or stevia I don’t know. Though I’m sure they have their own issues that someone will inform me of.

    We’ve all been there.

  8. yep, these and Lidl’s equivalents are great for the days you want to ‘spring clean’ 😀

  11. I don’t get how sweets like theses are even sold?

    “Hey would you like sweets that make you shit yourself if you eat more than 3?”

    “Well can I just have a bag of skittles instead?”

    “Oh yea you could, but they won’t make you shit yourself after 3…”

    “Yea I know that…I’ve had skittles before!”

    “So what I’m hearing is you don’t want to shit yourself?”

    “Not right now thanks”

  14. I did this once with a tub of ice cream from Sainsbury’s. For about five minutes, gravity had no power over me.

  16. I’ve had 3 packs in the past with no explosive situation. Worst bit about the is the stuck to my teeth.

  17. See also: Dried apricots.

    Please don’t buy a 1kg (!) bag of them and then scoff them on a 2 hour train journey that has an ‘informal chat’ for a fantastic job at the other end.

  19. A bit like the old saying “eat bran and the world falls out your bottom”

    Been there with similar, but in my case I made it to the bog in time and spent an hour roaring loudly and crying gently.

  20. Just a reminder to always heed those labels even the bravest stomachs have their limits!

  22. At least they weren’t minty or that mint/menthol mix, that’ll have the same reaction but burn like ice. It’s an unusual experience for sure.

  23. My dad discovered that years ago after finding out he was diabetic.

    now I only find real sweets hidden around 🙈

  24. FibreOne.

    Dear god, do not eat two of these on the bounce.

    I bought a pack on the way to work, driving from Newbury to Cardiff for a meeting with the MD.
    At 7.30am, I ate two as I neared Newport-a serious error in judgement.
    Stuck in traffic, I neared the Brynglas tunnel as they began to take effect. My bowels inflating with a sulphurous gas.

    Thankfully, after half an hour I entered Cardiff and knew the toilet was only 20 minutes away. I got to the office at 9.30 , the only toilet was occupied and was immediately collared by the MD and walked the green mile to the boardroom. As I sat there trying to concentrate through not only the drudge of his PowerPoint, but the building storm in my abdomen I began to make some quite strange noises as my stomach creaked and squealed from the pressure. He asked me if I was hungry and offered me a biscuit which I declined as I wiped my brow.

    A further 45 minutes passed and I was noticeably rolling side to side on the chair, palms pushing down on the armrests, struggling to hold in the farts.
    I had no choice but to quickly excuse myself.

    I shuffled to the toilet, releasing shitty puffs with every step and when I got there and sat down, Jesus – the fart that came out was a 14 seconds long, honk as if somebody torturing an adult male goose.

    What if I didn’t know is that FibreOnes contain something called chicory root fibre and apparently eating it in any excessive quantity, will produce enough gas to fill a road tanker.

    To this day, when I see these delicious bastards I tell the wife “Don’t ever eat more than one, ever.”

  25. Happened with the Lidl ones you buy by the tills.

    Decided to buy them for a little treat with the football.

    I knew about the Gummy bears, it didn’t really cross my mind though.

  26. My partner banned me from buying the sugar free hard candies of this “brand” – cola, sherbert lemon, that kind of thing. The ones in the little cardboard boxes.

    Turns out eating even one or two would create weapons-grade flatulence, to the point it’d wake her up in the night – not even from noise, but from smell.

    Was a shame because I thought they were quite tasty.

  27. Can confidently confirm these are on par with Plenvu and both equally ruin confidence in flatulence.

  28. They sell the exact thing things in Lidl too, they do liquorice and gummy bear ones too. Consume the whole packet immediately if you are constipated and you’ll feel three stone lighter after.

  29. I brought some Werthers originals for a flight to Mexico. Didn’t realise until a few hours into the flight I had brought the sugar free version. Was too late by then!

  31. For me it was cherries. Apparently eating a whole load of cherries is terrible for your stomach.

  32. I really struggle with most sugar free sweets. I bought sugar free Smints and I can only manage about 4 of the tiny things before the side effects started up.

  37. I did the exact same thing 10 days ago with the sugar free Lidl sweets – ate two packets of them whilst playing videogames and, holy moly, my arse didn’t know what had hit it. Couldn’t trust a fart for a few days.

  38. Maybe it’s my already-high fibre diet or maybe I should just eat more stodge but these things never seem to have any effect on me or my bowels. Disappointing, really….

  42. Same thing happened to me with the sugar free cola sherberts from Aldi! I felt like a new man!

  43. More or less the same with most “sugar free” stuff because they use the likes of sorbitol in its place.. in fact its also similar to a few commonly used liquid medications

  45. I have a pack stashed away for the next time I become , as the doctor likes to call it, severely impacted.

  46. Was it the sweetener Maltitol? I have to avoid it like the plague because of very similar symptoms to OP! 🥴

  47. I once grabbed a little box of sugar-free lemon sweets at the check out in Aldi. I ate the whole pack on the 10-minute journey home, and shat myself with my hand on the bathroom door.

  48. NEVER BUY these sugar free sweet. Has anyone had those soft chew worthers originals? Me, my mam and my dad all had sore stomach, back pains and horrendous farts.

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