And he spent the rest of the speech fighting the urge to call her up so he’d get to have time with the couch.
He meant sleep with* the couch.
why wouldn’t your wife want to talk to the people who would deport her if her papers didn’t check out?
I would call my wife up here to speak but then I think I’d ~~have to sleep on the couch~~ be in the doghouse.
Jesus Vance. Your name and couch should not be together. Much like your penis and couch shouldn’t be together.
Why are these inter-sectional perverts always trying to push their lifestyles on us
I don’t think she would allow him to sleep on/with the couch.
On?!?
What a weirdo. Why doesn’t he just fuck it like any normal person would?
![gif](giphy|3o85xnoIXebk3xYx4Q)
Lol how long before this guys house is just full of chairs not a couch to be seen. Y’all living in his head with this couch shit rent free and I love it!
*calls wife anyways hoping for the couch*
He’s like the deep trying to hide his octopus lover
JD Vance is the only man who has a better chance of having sex when his wife makes him sleep on the couch
Freudian slip cover
Kid’s parents find a bunch of S&M gear in his room. Mom says what are we going to do? Dad says we sure as hell aren’t going to spank him.
They should have all the sirens and whistles go off when he says couch like they did on Pee Wees playhouse when someone said the secret word.
Fuckin weirdo
The couch story is the best fake story possible. Just weird enough to be believable, and if he addresses the comments, it will make it worse because it proves it got to him
Hey, JD, the Trump Cult HATES your wife simply because she’s Indian-American.
They also HATE your kids and they call them horrible names.
This is never going to die. Lol Our great grandchildren are going to grow up believing this actually happened the same way we grew up believing the Richard Gere gerbil story was true.
Shit its better to sleep on it than with it I guess.
![gif](giphy|Ho2mVZ5dvsW7S)
ON the couch? Was so predictable, that this religious nut prefers the missionary position.
26 comments
https://x.com/QondiNtini/status/1818469151196811264
https://x.com/Acyn/status/1818452779163124031
(C)ouch.
Hey, look, everyone, it’s Vladimir Futon!
And he spent the rest of the speech fighting the urge to call her up so he’d get to have time with the couch.
He meant sleep with* the couch.
why wouldn’t your wife want to talk to the people who would deport her if her papers didn’t check out?
I would call my wife up here to speak but then I think I’d ~~have to sleep on the couch~~ be in the doghouse.
Jesus Vance. Your name and couch should not be together. Much like your penis and couch shouldn’t be together.
Why are these inter-sectional perverts always trying to push their lifestyles on us
I don’t think she would allow him to sleep on/with the couch.
On?!?
What a weirdo. Why doesn’t he just fuck it like any normal person would?
![gif](giphy|3o85xnoIXebk3xYx4Q)
Lol how long before this guys house is just full of chairs not a couch to be seen. Y’all living in his head with this couch shit rent free and I love it!
*calls wife anyways hoping for the couch*
He’s like the deep trying to hide his octopus lover
JD Vance is the only man who has a better chance of having sex when his wife makes him sleep on the couch
Freudian slip cover
Kid’s parents find a bunch of S&M gear in his room. Mom says what are we going to do? Dad says we sure as hell aren’t going to spank him.
They should have all the sirens and whistles go off when he says couch like they did on Pee Wees playhouse when someone said the secret word.
Fuckin weirdo
The couch story is the best fake story possible. Just weird enough to be believable, and if he addresses the comments, it will make it worse because it proves it got to him
Hey, JD, the Trump Cult HATES your wife simply because she’s Indian-American.
They also HATE your kids and they call them horrible names.
This is never going to die. Lol Our great grandchildren are going to grow up believing this actually happened the same way we grew up believing the Richard Gere gerbil story was true.
Shit its better to sleep on it than with it I guess.
![gif](giphy|Ho2mVZ5dvsW7S)
ON the couch? Was so predictable, that this religious nut prefers the missionary position.
https://preview.redd.it/0ljpay1c9wfd1.jpeg?width=2298&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=69bc14c59c26a2a2380b83ed6946049d3a6f67b2
Found Vance’s couch on facebook marketplace
“Don’t sit on my couch / Cuz I treat my object like women”
-Bo Burnham